Some time ago, I spoke to a preacher about what it was like to prepare to deliver a memorial service. He told me the question he likes to ask the family as he prepares his remarks is simple:
What defined them?
Often he said, the answer is hard to come by. Family might come up with stories about how they loved cats or bowling. Sometimes the silence is deafening.
Other times though, the family quickly breaks into stories about positive character traits. They have no trouble recounting stories of their generosity or wisdom, or sense of humor.
I thought about that today. If somebody was planning my memorial service and they were asked what defined me, what would they say?
Have you ever thought about that?
As I look at it, there are three possible scenarios:
- I don’t know what to say. The deceased simply lived an unremarkable life and as far as we can see, there is NOTHING memorable that defined them.
- I don’t want to say. The deceased was frankly, an angry, bitter, and unfriendly person and try as we might, there is nothing positive to say.
- Where do I start? The deceased had so many positive character traits that it might take several hours to talk about this.
If you’d like scenario #3 to be the case, what are you doing now to create it? It means taking a look at yourself and what you do and who you affect and come up with a strategy to make the most of your days. If you’re stuck in scenario #1 or God forbid, scenario #3, what are you going to do to change it?
A legacy doesn’t happen by accident. We all have to work to create it. I’m working on mine this week. Will you join me and look at yours?
