A few years ago, I attended an HR conference in Pennsylvania. I was speaking in the afternoon, so I arrived early to prep and network. During lunch, a few speakers came up to make announcements. Like most conferences, a big draw—besides the sessions—was networking. With over 300 attendees, the tables buzzed with conversation. As lunch wound down, people began leaving. By the time there were 20 minutes left in the break, only a third of the room remained.
The featured lunch speaker, representing the national chapter of the association, was there to talk about industry trends and how the national chapter could help. She was enthusiastic and energetic. Unfortunately, her audience numbered about 10, all seated up front. The rest of the room ignored her. Seemingly oblivious, she pressed on, reading from her prepared script. It was hard to watch. She either powered through like a pro and had a meltdown later, or she truly didn’t realize she was talking to an empty room. Her polite smile and the meager applause at the end told me all I needed to know.
That moment reminded me of a critical speaking skill: reading the audience. Body language says more than words—and it speaks loudly.
In the 1960s, researcher Albert Mehrabian studied communication and how influence is conveyed. His findings are often oversimplified into the cliché that 55% of communication is body language, 38% is tone, and only 7% is words. While that’s not entirely accurate, it’s true that body language is powerful. You have to be observant.
If you’re ever called to speak—whether to a large crowd or a small team to pitch an idea—keep these tips in mind:
- Empathize with Your Audience
If you’re speaking near lunchtime or at the end of the day, keep it short. Nobody will complain if you finish early. If it’s a mid-morning or late-afternoon slot, acknowledge the fatigue:
“Since it’s late in the day, I’ll keep this brief so we can all get out of here sooner.”
You’ll win fans fast.
- Speak Their Language
Use their jargon, not yours. Share examples they can relate to, not just ones from your world. Choose videos, audio clips, or analogies that tie the unfamiliar to something familiar to them. That’s how you transfer knowledge effectively.
- Tell a Story
Nothing connects like a well-told story. It grabs attention and keeps people engaged until the end. Practice your delivery, and make sure it’s your story. Skip tired, overused ones like “The Starfish on the Beach” or the “Battleship vs. Lighthouse” tale. If you want to look like a rookie, rely on clichés. Be authentic. Be you.
- Watch Their Body Language
This is where the lunch speaker failed. Had she noticed people leaving or tuning her out, she could’ve ditched the script and switched gears—maybe even told a story instead.
Even if speaking makes you nervous, there’s no better way to connect, convince, or lead a group. Don’t waste the opportunity by ignoring your audience. Read their body language. Engage them. When you connect, you can convince.